The last couple of weeks have been tough. A pause in working out last week has spilled into another 7 days of not sticking to the plan. It’s the beginning of the end. I’ve found several reasons to justify it to no-one but myself and that’s where previous efforts have fallen short. By this point I would normally claim that I’ve failed and go head-first into the no-exercise and food-binging I’ve become accustomed to.
But the problem is in that very mindset. I haven’t failed at all. This is simply the first in many obstacles that come with any challenge that is set. If a smoker has given up and smokes a cigarette after 4 weeks, it’s not a fail. As cliché as it sounds, when you slip up it’s completely up to you whether you get up and carry on. You’re allowed to trip over rocks; you’re even allowed to run face first into walls. Just don’t let it keep you on the ground.
Though I haven’t been as heavily focused on the weight loss journey these last couple of weeks, I’ve found satisfaction in other outlets to keep in a productive mind. For me, completing any goals, even as simple as tidying the flat, is the best thing I can do to feel like I’m moving forward.
I’ve had days where I’ve laid in bed until early afternoon, watching TV until I can be bothered to get up and shove something in the oven before returning to the TV until 2 in the morning, eventually going to sleep and repeating the process. Weeks would sometimes pan out like that if I had no commitments like work to remind me that none of this is possible without some sort of income. But if money wasn’t such a motivating factor, I could easily have been in hibernation for months. It honestly felt like I barely existed.
One thing I picked up from working in jobs that sometimes require me to literally wait for something to do (i.e. taking calls in a call centre) is that I have a robotic, low power mode when my mind hasn’t been tasked with something. Anyone with a creative mind, (which is everyone) soon discovers the perils of restricting it. Creativity essentially keeps me alive.
I was required to keep a notepad so I was constantly writing in between calls, even when the paperless movement forced my writing to digital platforms. It ranged from the words of colleagues and clients that left an impression on me, to the whispers of inspiration that came from working in the centre of Bristol. Writing wasn’t my only outlet of course, I often read books and blogs, doodled a lot and took many recommendations from others in the same boat, unless it was to play mindless internet games or read Daily Mail articles about the Kardashians. Even to this day I have a notebook that contains random words, drawings and other ideas that I look to either for inspiration or as a window into what I’ve been thinking over the last 5 years.
The key was anything that kept me stimulated and even made me enjoy being at work. Even on the days where I wasn’t feeling particularly motivated to create something, a Sudoku or a crossword on the Guardian website still kept me pretty satisfied. Find whatever keeps your mind happy and make your very best effort to do it every day.
For the days or weeks that I’m not finding motivation to exercise, I give myself a choice: either work towards your fitness goals or work towards your writing. Fortunately, I’ve had my dissertation, the blog and various assignments keeping me focused, especially in these past couple of weeks. It’s given me enough space to rediscover my motivation to work out again and refocus on my long term goals. On a train journey headed to failure, don’t just sit and wait for that final destination.
Writer Pending 